Good morning! I tried SO hard to do this last night and fell asleep with the laptop in bed. so, we will try again. yesterday was HARD! ugg. i felt off all day and i think i was lonesome for kenzee and not being able to hug her, love her and celebrate the beautiful human she is on her special day! it felt like i did the hardest ab workout ever. i talked with the doctor about adding the diuretic today but we will see. i am feeling better now and will explain maybe why in a bit! Dr. Romero said it is “normal”, lol. a very common sentence here, and i say Amen to that. my body is working so hard to fight right now as they are adding all of these therapies. As i look around i am BLESSED beyond measure. i will keep my chin up and my heals dug in to my firm foundation. SLEEPING is something here, so my continued prayer request, i need my husband in the SAME bed!! it is sometimes the silliest things until you don’t have that you don’t realize.

matthew 6:33-34 So above all, constantly seek God’s kingdom and his righteousness, then all these less important things will be given to abundantly. Refuse to worry about tomorrow, but deal with each challenge that comes your way, one day at a time. Tomorrow will take care of itself. this verse is one we should aLL live by. The lord blesses us when we seek hIM. worrying is not trusting God, it’s that simple. we often think we have a better Way Or want to control the situation. well, let me tell you, the big “C” word hits you and you realize quickly that you do not have any control. that is a tough place for a control freak! that is the place where he wants us to be, because that is when we are humbled…we stop, seek, and listen to the lord. he wants us to seek him first for comfort and for hIS plan. if we quiet our minds, we hear him above the noise of this world. I wouldn’t take any of this away. i am not the same as i was a year ago. we all have choices on how we react to situations, once you shake off the shock of it all, i know i will be better because of this journey and be able to help people in a cOMPLETELY different way that i could have ever anticipated. The Lord can not show us the whole picture ahead of time, it would be too much for our little brains to comprehend. he did give me this verse early on. 2 corinthians 1:3-4 all praise to god, the father of our lord jesus christ. god is our merciful father and the source of ALL comfort. He comforts us in All our troubles SO THAT we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the SAME comfort God has given us. Could that verse be ANY more awesome! This is the verse i have been clinging to since the beginning knowing that god will and is using me now, but even more in the future, the time is coming. I believe. think about it, the same comfort, wow! that is powerful and makes me SO excited. I can not even grasp what it all looks like, but i KNOW it is good.

yesterday, i did feel like i have slept a little better but did not feel good all day until right before bed! Again, it was usual therapies-coffee enema/ozone, Oxygen chamber, b17 iV, PEMF, Vibe, Sauna, full body red light therapy, indiba. i met with a very kind doctor that explained the low dose chemo (IPT) more and that he has been working with it since 1999, kind of crazy that it is a big secret in america! he also recommends Avastin the day after the chemo. so, i walk by faith and know that i am also putting in SO many good things to combat some of these chemicals. he also said that he does not see bad reactions to this type of treatment. I will also do Heckel heat therapy the day after because it is when the cancer cells are the weakest and they HATE heat. let’s do it!! i will explain more in the next few days. this is a 3 hour heat therapy, they want my temp to be 105 rectally. god will give me what i need for that day, so i will not fear. i know that and that god will use this to kill and destroy EVERY last cancer cell. amen! that was before lunch:) after lunch i did an added 2 hour vitamin IV the doctor order extra to help me feel better. they are so caring here about every detail. then i did the photo dynamic therapy plus and the H2 inhaler. that all took until dinner and i could barely role out of bed. but i made myself go down to dinner because i knew (with matt’s pushing) that it would fill my soul…it did! I came back for another round of PEMF and the vibe plate which takes about 30 minutes for both of them. then they started my on a CBD iV. the benefits of this are pain relief, anti-inflammatory, anxiety relief, anti-tumor effects, neuroprotective, and heart health. they said i can do this 2 times a week, this is pretty expensive therapy. it was $1200 for 600 mg, i did 50mg last night and they will work up to 100 mg. so many of this extra therapies they are adding, have extra expenses. the IPT is $1970 per treatment with a minimum of 6 treatments. i was talking with a sweet lady last night and she was going to originally go to irvine california for IPT and their treatments were $6000-8000 a week for 18-24 treatments. so that puts some perspective on it for me! plus, i serve a god that uses a different kind of Calculator and he ALWAYS provides. my pain and bloating feels so much better today reguardless of the fact of 4 1/2 hours of sleep! I awoke at 1:33, used the restroom and then WIDE awake until i got out of bed at 5:15. i did take the melatonin combo last night at bed time, i am going to change and take it when i wake in the middle of the night and see if the outcomes are better!!

Today is a day filled with lOTS of new therapies. TCM IV before chemo and a shot after chemo (i have no idea what that is, so i’ll know more tomorrow). I also have a Sunivera injection today. lots of shots and one of them they call the scorpion…so that gets in your head a bit!! but the lord will give me what i need at the moment. the IPT chemo is “around” 3 today. also, the power goes off at the clinic from 1-5ish, i don’t know why exactly but i have to try to get as many therapies done as i can this morning! also, i am fasting today until chemo, because research shows that it weakens the cancer cells and makes the chemo more effective. the doctor said i could eat breakfast, but i am choosing to not eat until dinner. my blood pressure is really low naturally and so i would love prayers for strength and no dizziness or weakness. then they inject you with insulin prior to the chemo, which will drop my blood sugar even more. i am feeling good and positive about today. knowing where my strength comes from is not of my own power.

on that note! psalms 103:2 let all that i am praise the lord; may i never forget the good things he does for me.